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a daughter who loves her parents and family so much. a friend who treasures friendship more than her relationship with a guy. a student who has always tried her best and gave it all out in whatever she is doing. a loner who is still searching for her eternal love that she believes can bring her together to jannah. last but not least...a humble servant who heart belongs to Allah swt. and my name is Farhana Latiff.

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December 17, 2011

A letter for a friend who is too near front of the eyes but too far from the heart

What a passed like nothing has ever happened to me. But the truth is, i'm totally in a deep pain. But i don't know where to go, i don't know with who should i share this pain. I feel so lonely, perhaps i should just get a pistol and killed myself. Everyone gonna be happy, and me too, ain't it right?

I have once got a friend, who i taught could be the wall to lean and support me from keep falling. I used to have that one friend where i used to share a lot of stories with her. I used to have that one friend who always stands by my side eventhough the whole world is laughing at my clumsiness and stupiditiness. I used to have that one friend  who always knew how to comfort me and make me feel worthy in this cruel life. 

But where did she go? That one friend has never give her advice to me with a high tone. But she just didi it on that one day. From that moment, everything has changes...i just knew that things are not gonna be like we used to have like before. I don't know her, she has changed, pretty lot of changes. Maybe she's just cannot stand with my clumsiness, silliness, unperfectness anymore. I guess she feels ashamed when she's being with me. Sorry FRIEND if i made you feel like that, i'm totally sorry.

How i wish you know that i missed those past days we spend together so i wish you will know i miss you, FRIEND...but i just knew, we'll never be like before. Cause i just can't let myself to forgive you that easily. The hatred of seeing you being happy by abandoning me is totally unforgiven, how could you be so mean? Don't you ever once think about my feeling, what it feels to be like at my place if God let us switch place? Yeaa, i know, you don't feel guilty at all cause if you feel it, you won't leave me just like that. You aren't the only  friend that i got in this world, surely i have plenty of them, but i feel sorry that our friendship turned out this way. Goodbye my FRIEND.....hope your life will be more cheerful without my presence ='(

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